And I Swore In My Wrath
..."Thou shalt not enter Target in the mega cart EVER again."
The mega cart. Do you know the mega cart that lives on the far lane of carts at Target? Well, it has two forward facing seats and the rest is a regular cart. Two special seats and three special kids. Sharing becomes a necessity and chaos ensues.
Halfway through the 15-minute shopping endeavor, Claire decides she wants to walk. She walks nicely for a few minutes, gets frustrated about something, and I pick her up. She proceeds to throw a fit that would have won her a gold-medal--if fit-throwing were an Olympian event. Sooo, I keep her firmly in my grasp. As her volume increases, Brandon and Corrine cover their ears with their hands and sing loudly.
"Brandon. Corrine. Really?" I ask.
"But, Momma, she's way too loud," says Brandon.
He's right. She is.
People gawk. Some with disgust, some with wonder, and some with sympathy. I can hear people talking about us, but I can't understand what they're saying. "Sorry," I mumble to the lady walking behind me towards the checkout stand.
"Oh, don't be. I'm just wondering how you do it."
Do what? Get my family to be the largest attraction in a store filled with 200+ shoppers? Or handle all this chaos with serene calm and patience? "Yes, well, sometimes I feel like I'm going insane," I reply.
The same serene calm and patience that gets me through my shopping list allows me to remember exactly where I parked the car after perusing the parking lot for several minutes.
Claire cries the entire way home. Brandon can't stand her crying, so he hits her. That works wonders for the crying spell, as you can well imagine. Then Claire hits Brandon in the face. Corrine decides that while Claire is distracting him, she can preform a sneak attack. She claws him on the face. Now Brandon is wailing louder than Claire. "I'm bleeding! I'm bleeding! I'm bleeeeeding!"
I pull into the driveway, park, and tromp into the house. Brandon cleans up his face and some behavioral instruction follows.
Maybe my kids are absolutely crazy. Or maybe I'm absolutely crazy. But a recent conversation with a mother of grown children comes to mind. "I so miss shopping with my kids when they were little. It such a special thing."
Really?
The mega cart. Do you know the mega cart that lives on the far lane of carts at Target? Well, it has two forward facing seats and the rest is a regular cart. Two special seats and three special kids. Sharing becomes a necessity and chaos ensues.
Halfway through the 15-minute shopping endeavor, Claire decides she wants to walk. She walks nicely for a few minutes, gets frustrated about something, and I pick her up. She proceeds to throw a fit that would have won her a gold-medal--if fit-throwing were an Olympian event. Sooo, I keep her firmly in my grasp. As her volume increases, Brandon and Corrine cover their ears with their hands and sing loudly.
"Brandon. Corrine. Really?" I ask.
"But, Momma, she's way too loud," says Brandon.
He's right. She is.
People gawk. Some with disgust, some with wonder, and some with sympathy. I can hear people talking about us, but I can't understand what they're saying. "Sorry," I mumble to the lady walking behind me towards the checkout stand.
"Oh, don't be. I'm just wondering how you do it."
Do what? Get my family to be the largest attraction in a store filled with 200+ shoppers? Or handle all this chaos with serene calm and patience? "Yes, well, sometimes I feel like I'm going insane," I reply.
The same serene calm and patience that gets me through my shopping list allows me to remember exactly where I parked the car after perusing the parking lot for several minutes.
Claire cries the entire way home. Brandon can't stand her crying, so he hits her. That works wonders for the crying spell, as you can well imagine. Then Claire hits Brandon in the face. Corrine decides that while Claire is distracting him, she can preform a sneak attack. She claws him on the face. Now Brandon is wailing louder than Claire. "I'm bleeding! I'm bleeding! I'm bleeeeeding!"
I pull into the driveway, park, and tromp into the house. Brandon cleans up his face and some behavioral instruction follows.
Maybe my kids are absolutely crazy. Or maybe I'm absolutely crazy. But a recent conversation with a mother of grown children comes to mind. "I so miss shopping with my kids when they were little. It such a special thing."
Really?
oh this made me laugh! too bad i'm not having a bad day, this would have cheered me right out of my blues!! : ) wish i could forward this little diddy around to a few of my favs peeps. you will love reading this in 10 years. good for you for blogging.
ReplyDelete:) I'm not opposed to the copy and paste idea...I'm just not feeling quite ready to expose the entire fam to the big, wide world yet. So, copy and paste to your heart's content.
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