The Healing River

It's been almost two weeks since my depressing post about my declining health.

The support given, prayers offered, and love shown have been amazing.  Thank you.

Many of you have taken the time to contact me and share your story.  You've given me a little glimpse into your world.  A world that I never knew existed.  I thank you for that.  Don't stop.

One of my friends sent me an email that started like this:

so i kinda hesitate to type but figure what the heck. i can kinda picture you being flooded with advice after putting your blog post out there and that's the last thing i want to do. obviously not a dr here. 

and i'm sure you're just as much as a skeptic as i am but then again, so was naaman. and all he had to do was jump in the river seven times.

It made me smile.  Partly because the way she writes just does that--it puts a smile on your face.  And partly because I relate so well to the story of Naaman.  Independent, skeptical, proficient, and full of pride.  But if the years haven't taught me anything about humility, the past few months certainly have.

People have seen my house messier than I ever care for it to be seen.  People have fed and cared for my family.

Like Naaman, many years ago my heart was helpless, hurting, prideful, and independent.  My heart was sick.  It was oh, so sick and in great need of healing.  I was young, very young.  But even the very young know when they're sick.

And like Naaman, someone had told me about the Great Healer.  So, because I was tired, so tired of being sick, I sent for Great Healer.  The Great Healer came.  He offered me healing, but refused payment.  Not because it didn't cost anything.  It did.  It cost the Great Healer everything.  But it was a gift of love.  I accepted His gift of love, then He washed my heart clean in the River of Grace.

That type of healing is the greatest healing of all: heart healing.

Now my body is sick. And I'm asking Him for healing once again.  

About a week and a half ago, I sat on the door stoop with the morning sun washing over my body and soul.  I read words of life.  I prayed.  I prayed for healing.  I prayed for wisdom.

So many choices have been set before me: Plexus, Genesis Pure, herbal hormone vitamins, Kombucha, Chlorophyll water, lemon water, detox diets, gluten-free, grain-free, Paleo, candida diet, raw foods, soy-free, corn-free, dairy-free, amylose-free, etc.

I do not doubt for one minute that any of the above have provided healing for others when they needed it.  But I don't know yet which one God is calling me to, or if He's calling me to something different.

But I've been praying for wisdom and am confident He will give it.  He promised that He will give it freely.

I do think it's interesting that Jesus did not heal everyone in the same manner. For one He spat in the dirt to make mud for his eyelids, then had him wash it off.  Another simply touched the hem of His garment.  Some, He touched.  One He told to pick up his bed and walk.

So, I'm waiting.  Waiting for Him to led me to the river, because I don't know the way.

I have felt called to make some changes to my diet. Whether it has helped or not, I'm not sure, yet.  However, I have been doing REMARKABLY better the past 10 days.  Coincidence?  Maybe.  But I'm soaking it up.  I have been doing all my normal household routines, mowing the lawn, wearing my wedding ring (haven't been able to do that since March), and jumping on the trampoline for exercise (and it doesn't hurt).  I've only taken 3 naps in the past 10 days and cried twice.  There appears to be a very direct correlation between the amount of inflammation and depression.  I feel so much happier.  And that's a wonderful, glorious feeling.

Brandon and Corrine are especially thrilled with this up-swing.  Corrine said, "I like it when you feel good.  You don't get frustrated and say things like, 'I want you to go clean up your room right now.'"  Brandon's just happy that he gets to play sports and cook with me again.

And that makes me happy too.

Thank you all again for your prayers and concern.  You have touched our family.

(It's like a river, only it's an ocean...with birds...lots of them.  How's that for random?)